As time passes by, relationships change, What once was feared, now becomes a friend. What once was ignored now becomes essential, The self changes too. The flowing cascade quietens into a gentle river, The taker become the giver, The beauty fades but the wisdom gains an elegance profound, Quieter become the celebrations, gentler become the sounds. Patience is the new bestie, The being bides his time. Knowing that by the end of it all, Every thing will fall in line, The desired gift will be given, but by someone in a disguise, The wealth of the world no longer remains important, The love of those close will suffice. He smiles indulgently at the little ones crying, He gently encourages them, watches them failing yet trying. Their struggles remind him of his own, He marvels at the time that has flown. As the old mountain watches the landscape change and the young ones grow, He realizes what he understands today, Tomorrow they too will know. – Shailaza
There is a little voice That lives in all our heads. It may be your parent or your sibling or your friend. Everytime you think something That little voice becomes the censor with scissors. It judges you, it praises you, it even berates. Sometimes, it becomes louder and irritates. No, it is not your conscious or the voice that tells you right from wrong. That voice is a quiet whisper This voice is loud and strong. This voice is about people pleasing. What will he or she say. That voice doesnt care about people It only wants you to do the right thing everyday. No doubt, our folks want the best for us But they human too, Everything that scares them, they will tell you not to do. Their right and wrong is about how safe you’ll be The greater good they sometimes dont see. So, remember that the world we live in today, Our parents couldn’t even imagine yesterday. So take their advise but dont live by their fear of the unknown For had our scientists or inventors listened to that voice Human kind wouldnt have progressed or grown. – Shailaza
Malashri Lal is not just a daughter of a very successful and renowned man, she is also a respected professor, critic and a bestselling author who is known for fiction and non-fiction books. However, her accomplishments extend beyond the prose. Her recently released book of poems, ‘Mandalas Of Time’, has proven that she is a master of the verse as well.
Once while talking about the IAS officers of Rajasthan origin not going to central government on deputation, the common refrain that emerged was the poor standard of English in the IAS officers of Rajasthan origin was the main cause for the poor representation in the set up in Delhi. There were of course some exceptions like D. R. Mehta, Jagat Mehta and Bhawani Mal Mathur. But of these three, two studied outside and not in Rajasthan. So, when a local lass made it big as the professor and the head of department and dean in the Mecca of English in north India, i.e. Delhi University , it was a matter of exceptional pride for the people of this feudal desert state. It was like a domestic tiny sparrow flying high in the ionosphere on the strength of its wings alone. Beauty, brains and poise- Malashri had everything going for her since her schooling in MGD, graduation in Maharani College, M.A. in Rajasthan University. In the 60s, St. Xavier’s School Fair was the high point in the social calendar of young people, when the girls from MGD used to visit the fair.
Malashri Lal
Remembers Dr. Gautam Sen, the venerable cardiovascular surgeon of Jaipur, probably the first of its kind in Jaipur (he in mid-eighties now and probably a decade senior to Malashri) that Xavier’s boys and alumni used to wait for the MGDians to descent from their bus on to the fairgrounds. Even amongst the 20-30 MGDians who came to the fair, Malashri stood out shining beautiful and poised. The doctor’s reaction was also the response of most of the senior Xavierites of seventh and eighth class onwards attending the fair.
These Xavierites now in their 60s remember most about her after her beauty was charm and poise, she exuded, probably inherited from Mohan Mukherjee, her father who also happened to be the chief secretary of Rajasthan, still remembered for his gentlemanliness, politeness and patience. He was a person to go to for young IAS officers when faced with knotty situations which was often in revenue matters and other administration where laws and procedures were almost copied from UP or Bengal governments and not evolved in the legislative assembly after long discussions and deliberations.
One aspect of Malashri’s personality which probably most Xavierites and Jaipurites were not conversant with is the academic excellence and poetic depth of Mohan Mukherjee’s daughter as is reflected in the ‘Mandalas of Time’, a book of 75 poems she has presented to the literati. Here Arbit is making an attempt to showcase these in its columns. The word literati is deliberately used because though Jaipurites were not fully aware of the academic and poetic heights of Malashri’s pen, but to the literati of Delhi and abroad, it was no secret. In fact, Bashabi Fraser, professor of English and creative writing, Edinburgh, Napier University writes, “Malashri’s poems are a lifetime labour of love, embodying and resolving the dichotomies and different loyalties and loves that the poet has carried with her through her life.”
“One the one hand, the poet has the memory of watching and listening to the Bhopa singers accompanied by the dancing folk epics in her home town of Jaipur in the 1960s, performed by the roving artists against the light of the oil lamps in the Jaipur mela. On the other, there is the deep resonance of her heritage, finding a voice which is steeped in Rabindranath Tagore’s atmosphere of Bengali culture and literature and cultural freedom practiced at Shantiniketan.” As Malashri puts in one of the poems: “The feudal heritage of my childhood Fights with the reformist Bengali lineage, My troubled feminism struggling Between the Poshak and Purdah.” The awareness of today’s threat of climate change as Malashri writes reassuringly , “the moon is so far from the earthly pollution” in spite of the “footprint of human ego.” In the poems, Malashri proves herself to be a consummate wordsmith who combines in her multifaceted self her multicultural identities bringing world’s together through telling imagery in compelling rhythms. The poet recalls the lessons learnt from Tagore: “…I learnt from Gurudev, Emotions have no fixed language. The merit has no physical limits. Music resounds in the open sky, Dance is the joy of a free spirit anywhere” Bashir Fraser writes, “Mandalas of time is the expressive voice of a true free spirit who creates harmony through her voice. These poems sing of “life renewal” affirming a “beautiful certainty.” Another “fellow traveller” friend and well-known literary critique writer Ranjit Hoskote writes thus “The sensuous abundance of the natural world pervades Malashri’s Mandalas of Time. These poems celebrate the arboreal and the floral. They evoke a profusion of trees, shrubs, fruits and flowers. But, nature to Malashri is not a grand theatre that enfolds to its own music offering to delight but rejecting our participation. On the contrary, she approaches nature as an intimate, integral party of a continuum that includes the human realm with all its discontent.” It is a fact even as nature infiltrates our consciousness in subtle ways we exert a claim over nature through language and scientific scrutiny. Malashri’s poems record, intuitively, the process of pull-push that results from this, our own desire to carve and the resistance on the part of the things we seek to name. And yet, Malashri celebrates the colours and flavours, the aesthetic surplus and memorable inner success of Indian culture, she never loses sight of all the elements with the tradition that calls out to be confronted and critiqued. The joy in the textiles, the vistas and the epics of Rajasthan is balance by her elegiac awareness of female infanticide in that region. Her poems never shy away from revealing the suppression of female will and desire that often serves as a foundation for the myths of the feudal patriarchal order. She interestingly asks when the mountains have brought low by global warming, the forests denuded, the rivers poisoned, where can the gods live now? In the same breath her poems urge us to ask: how do we live, by what rules, by what canon of conduct towards others -human and more than human- with whomever we share the planet? Shall be merely survive or could we yet relearn to flourish and learn to flower with, and not flower at the expense of. Let us learn from “the supple leaves” that: “Flat and curved Cradle the flowers that have no other family.” Malashri herself quotes Khalil Gibran when talking about her poetry, “Poetry is a dash of joy, pain and wonder with a dash of dictionary.” She also quotes Andre Horde “ […] Poetry is not a luxury. It is a vital necessity of our existence. It forms the quality of light within which we can predicate our hopes and dreams towards survival and change.” “In the larger context of my life narrative, I have come to believe that poetry is a balm for the troubling dislocations that are an inevitable part of the experience. The biographical aspect drowns under the issue of transition and transformation that poetry hopes to articulate.” “Only poetry captures the inner dialogues, the cracked mirror of troubled consciousness, the silent cry of those who travelled beyond tears. Its value resides in principle of integrity, and genuineness.”
Malashri Lal with her husband Robey Lal and friend Sudhir Mathur
According to Malashri, “The inner transition too and these poems are perhaps the most challenging. Every poet and novelist in every language from time immemorial has carved stories from a store of emotions. My personal poems are droplets in the same ocean of desire for an immutable world while coping with the angst of its forfeitures that dawns the realization that bereavement, heartbreak, betrayal is both individual and universal.” She remembers Tagore’s anguished call, “when I stand before thee at the days end, thou shall see my scars and know that I had my wounds and also my healings.”
Mohan Mukherjee with Y B Chavan, Maharashtra’s first chief minister
Looks come from genealogy and grace and poise from upbringing given by parents. But your achievements are your own, acquired through your hard work, determination and honed talent. One creation of hers that in totality, embodies different aspects of her creativity is called “Ardhanareesvara” The poem shows her philosophical sensitivities, her comfort level with mythology and folklore and her sympathy, sensitivity leading to rebellion against patriarchal society and values. She seeks equality and fairness between man and woman and leads to the ultimate equality i.e. Ardhanareesvara. Ranjit Hoskote writes, “The dyadic interplay of opposites- the dvandva, in classical terms- forms the ground rhythm of Professor Lal’s poetry. Nature and human kind are one such pair; Shiva and Shakti another; Radha and Krishna yet another, each incomplete without the pulsation and presence of the other. Krishna’s flute, cast aside in the Vrindavan of his teenage years as he goes away to Dwarka, adulthood and kingship never to return- Radha picks it up and preserves it as a keepsake, but it will never be played again, a mere reed emptied of affect and significance. Shiva cannot achieve his fullness without Shakti and the poet evokes them as an inseparable composite, the Ardhanareesvara. Such ideals of communion, to be regarded as at once sacred and worldly- for these, too are a dvandva in Indic thought, not binary poles- emerge in Mandalas of Time, from a world of seasonal festivity and cultural expression offered in dedication to the Cosmos.”
//Ardhanareesvara “Indivisible unity, Parvati and Shiva forever entwined. Women and men interdependent, Infused with traits of each other A softer left lineament draped in finery, a muscular right stretched over taut skin Artistry overlaying a deep philosophy of a shared destiny Symbols associative of power and grace But not attributed to a dichotomous gendering. Sages, sculptors, storytellers knew the eternal truth That form bellies essence much of the time Masculinity and feminity are the same word, Read in reverse To denote the other That too is an illusion In Creation there is only One Ardhanareesvara The God who is both woman and man Ubiquitous, limitless reminder of equality.”//
To be continued…
This article by Shailaza Singh appeared in Rashtradoot Newspaper’s Arbit Section on Wednesday 24th April 2024
You said you wanted to be my best friend You said we will be more than friends You said our relationship will be special You said there will be no judgements You said you will always be there You said you will always care My heart thought it had found its mate I thought I could finally thank fates I stopped looking For I believed it to be you. And then you vanished. Long conversations were replaced by a loud silence That laughed at me and said YOU DAMN LOVE SEEKING FOOL!WHEN WIL YOU EVER LEARN? – Shailaza
Those eyes gaze at me With a semblance of a smile Or perhaps it is my imagination She doesn’t speak Everyday we sing to her, we praise her Shower her with flowers In the hope that she show us her power Day after day songs of hope resound on her walls like a prayer Unheard pleas wonder if she is really there? The bells vying for her attention Hoping for a miracle to see life through Some one’s granted wish gives hope anew Time works as her agent it seems Gently weaving desires through reality and dreams She stands there impassive watching over the night and day While laughing anklets dance and tinkle away What does she think, what does she do? Is she different or is she just like me or you? She invites questions but answers come on their own pace The eyes of the seeker arrested by the face Silent tears ask her for peace and solace They promise a lifetime of devotion in return for some grace.
Is war exempted from the list of crimes? First they kill thousands of innocents And then they talk peace? Mass murder and a white flag What good are these? If someone kills someone He is awarded life or death by the law Why are wars exempt? Those soldiers who died Were they brave or they had no choice? Just like those who were killed had no voice. Just come in, bombard and discuss peace once you are done? Kill millions with your bombs, tanks and guns? Is it a game that those in power play? We had war yesterday, let us have peace today? There is no world court for justice Countries bestow aids like alms Rest make money while people pay the price of a false calm -Shailaza
What if I miss out on a relationship? Or have no love in life at all? What if I don’t get anyone? No one to date or no one to call? Fears like these make us vulnerable To predaters, narcissists and many more. Because of this fear, we accept anything that knocks at our door. What if my true love never came? What if I lose the dating game? What if this person is really a good guy? What if love passes me by? These fears take away the patience that we need To sift through abusers and genuine love that is not fueled by greed. Any true love or person has inbuilt patience to let you explore. They have the time to tell you more. A genuine friendship will develop with the right mate. Heaven will give you signs and so will fate. So stop having these fears before it is too late. Wait patiently for someone who wants everything that is you. Genuine, understanding and willing to start something new Wait for true love or nothing at all. Fear or love, now that’s your call.
Maybe Some day, you a stranger Will chance upon these lines. Addressed to you. Unknown to the poet You will wonder what is it that it wants to say? All these poems in this address Are moments of the poet’s love, ecstasy even despair. May be when you will read this, the poet may not even be there. But just like we earthlings have been sending messages of hope into the deep space. Hoping to meet someone who understands This poem is on similar lines May be some day tempted by fate or some plan divine You would come here and discover some words That have been spoken but not heard You may be tempted to explore, To perhaps knock at the door Of this rambling house in the wild. Perhaps the creaking, rickety door Will be opened by a gnarled old lady Or a young inquisitive child. Maybe you will be invited in And led by your curiosity You will inquire about these jewels so carelessly strewn And whether you can collect them to shape them into something for the world. It is then the poet would know that all her prayers have been finally heard. -Shailaza
Do they really exist? These online love stories Everyday’s phone calls or chats Do they really make a difference After months of chatting The person on the other side can say he is busy Or after months of heart felt conversations One of them turns out married. In the absence of the body language Words are a poor substitute Coz they cannot hold or touch or hug Emoticons are cute but they hardly suffice To fulfill the physical presence The lonely souls on each side of the void Desparately seeking a soulmate Are left in the dark again. Some get back into the dating game While others drown themselves in work or wine Even when the online affair carries on And the online lovers meet They walk gingerly across the chasm of expectation Hoping to avoid the sword of disappointment That can rip their tender hope apart. But despite technology Given the distance, life style, work and the age Most lovers never meet The love pretense of the online life never lasts Some stolen moments later Each struggles to find the elusive One Meanwhile dating sites mint money.
In a world where there is no dearth of words, Where all talks of love seem so made up and absurd, How does one believe when words are so carelessly thrown, How does one trust where stories of betrayal are all well known The cajoling, the gentle persuasion are all so sadly amiss, No longer do people reminisce about their very first kiss. Physical closeness is more in trend these days, But once that aim is achieved love hardly stays. Fear rules, Those hungry beasts love to fool, They seduce, conquer, move on and feel so cool. Transactional reltionships flood the land. No one to actually talk those sweet nothings, No one to understand. Where are those days of sweet, idyllic talks Of the stolen moments and the rambling country walks. Of those scented letters that promised a forever. Unlike the short messages of today that threaten a now or never. Of the romance and the wooing of the lady with ardor and passion. Today, short term or no term encounters are such a rampant fashion. The heart is dismayed The head is bewildered With the animals that abound and the jungle thats grown. In such a world, how does one step into the great unknown? Shailaza Singh
A friend asked me what kind of guy do I seek? Someone outspoken or someone meek. What is it that I am looking for? I said I was really not sure. I dont have any experience in dating men, I have seen men who are gruff but softies from the heart, I have observed even those who look good but are crooks from the start. There are those who wear their heart on their sleeve, And some who cant do without their pet peeve. But then all of them are good or crazy in some way, So one cannot really decide in a day. A relationship is born like a baby and has to be nutured like one. A tapestry so fine that pull one thread ever so slightly And the whole work is undone. But then how does one know the right choice? Is it the face or the walk or the countenance or the voice? Perhaps it is a thing beyond any logic of the heart and mind. Perhaps my soul will know my mate when it finds. For across the time and space there is something that binds. May be its the universal play of energy, matter that takes a form, Or may be there is an eternal magic spell Which is awakened in ever heart so that it can recognize and tell. So how do I know what will be his form, shape or size.. All I pray is that I be given the power to see through the disguise.
I have really thought hard and long. Does age matter in hiring? Why should it? Especially when you are just a 40 something..So, I thought so hard that a poem came out of me!
Dear Hiring Manager,
I started my journey late, Had to struggle a bit, Since nothing was served on a plate. The years passed and the numbers rolled. But I was busy changing lead to gold. I applied for positions so that I could showcase my ability, I am wise, mature, very creative and very witty. I am a bit older to those who have applied for this position, But I have more insight, more depth and precision. Yet the hiring manager looks at my age, And throws my application in the ‘rejection’ platter. I am not applying to be a jawan in the army (though Shahrukh Khan can), So why does my age matter? I am not 100 or 90 that I would leave the world anytime soon, I am just a bit over 40, not over the moon! Yet when I apply for a position, people say I have missed the train, How is that I wonder with the years of experience that I have gained. I keep learning something new every year, My vision is sharp and my mind is crystal clear. Dear hiring managers, there is another perspective too… If life begins at 40, I can be hired right away for I am way younger than you!
Some old clothes are not to throw away, Some old clothes you should try again one day. To see how much you’ve changed. Some old clothes when you wear again To see the weight loss or gain Some old clothes you wear to remember who you are No matter how cloudy the night, you are still what you once were- a beautiful star. People say you shouldn’t dwell in the past, ‘Cause the days never last. Yes tis’ true that you should keep moving ahead because life is always about the new, But some old clothes help you in making friends with the old ‘you’ Not that you shouldn’t throw away the old.. But some old clothes that show you who you really are or how far you’ve come are just pure gold. – Shailaza Singh
We grow crops of all kinds, Now let us start growing entrepreneurial minds. Young people who don’t look for jobs But create their own enterprise. Independent, small, self sufficient business owners Who can employ themselves and create jobs too Not Birlas or Tatas or Ambanis But people like me and you. Let them be supported in every way, Let them become successful So that others do what they do, And listen to what they say. So far, people have been going abroad, To pursue success, Because their own country wasn’t conducive to their growth, Didn’t support them or give them access. Let India now become a growth giant That nurtures home grown enterprises And helps them grow beyond their imagination, What will it take for us to become such a innovative nation?
Someone told my dad I don’t know how to talk Perhaps they are right. For I tend to speak my mind. They like girls who are polite and demure, Girls who let them take the lead, Timid and unsure. Girls who are labelled docile, homely and kind But I prefer to speak my mind Being polite and respectful is a virtue, Respect is mutual; If you respect me I will respect you. Men often feel it’s their birthright to be heard. And treat women like their property or like cattle and herd. Such a thinking is quite common to find But I prefer to speak my mind. Those who oppress love finding faults in those who stand up for their rights They like to berate and admonish those who fight But those who refuse to bow down are the leaders of mankind And I love to speak my mind. -Shailaza Singh
When you write a poem or a couplet or a song It doesn’t need you to think for long It flows like the river And it finds a home in your heart It is more than a work of art. It is a dictat from your higher self, It is the universe conversing and consoling you Through these words it is telling you what you need to know or what you need to do A poem is like music that doesnt require you to think It is a symphony, a song that you already know how to sing It is a true reflection of your inner voice Which you sometimes can’t hear in everyday life Because of the incessant noise So when a poem rains in your heart Let it drench you with its words Let it flow For then it will whisper to you What you really need to learn What you really need to know -Shailaza Singh
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